Hi Regina, (here comes another long posting)...

I just got back, watched your video, and read your posting. As you now know, everyone thinks your playing is really good. And you got one of Beth's wonderful video responses that pinpoints and visually demonstrates more than a few fine points. (The response videos - detailed, focussed individually, public so everyone can learn from them -- this is Internet learning at its best, no doubt in my mind...)

After I watched and read your posting, I was left wondering, "So exactly why is she "just not happy with it" after 2 months?" You talk a bit about making mistakes and having to start over again, and having to do 10 takes to get a recording all the way through. (Haha, most of us video posters would say, "What??? She got away with only 10 takes, and not 40?? :-) She must be really good!)

So for my two bits on your video:

1. Separate the ideas of playing ability and what the video looks like. The main technical point of a video is to record your abilities on a particular song, on a particular day, when you're in a particular mood, etc. The video _is_ your recital. (It's a huge bonus that you can have us all post our two bits - and you're really lucky to get a response video from Beth (we can all learn from those)). So please be encouraged -- a video is just a snapshot of your playing ability on a particular song, at a particular point in time, etc.

2. The video is a snapshot of one step on your violin journey, nothing more. If you're not happy with it, it only means that there is a gap between your vision and your reality of playing ability -- maybe you expect too much too soon.

My way of thinking about it is that you have to go through a bunch of steps to get from where you start to where you're going. Every person's journey is different. So I try not to be unhappy with myself (or with my playing) if I can't play something that is at the edge of my abilities. (There will always be pieces at the edge of my abiliites, and beyond my abilites, so why should I worry about that?).

I liked Treble's comment about "fix it now or fix it later" -- it made me smile. The trick is to learn to enjoy the steps of your journey, whether they be large or small, fast or slow.

As long as you're making some progress (which you _obviously_ have done), then what journey could be better? For example, if you could suddenly jump to Beth's level, would you feel any different when you played a piece at the edge of your abilities? My guess is not -- if you made mistakes, and still couldn't play it through every time, and still had to do 10 takes (What?? Only 10 takes?? :-) to make a recital video, would you feel any different?

You get the idea -- enjoy the challenge of getting better, without letting the gap between your vision and your current abilities get you down. Rope in the vision until the gap is less bothersome. Violin is tough. I don't know why people let their gaps get too big, not only on the violin journey, but also on the life journey. Big gaps, when you focus or fixate on them, can create great dissatisfaction.

Specifically On Your Video

My two bits on your video are these: Obviously you play well, and have lots of basic techniques in place for further advancement.

My first sense of the video was on the bowing. To my eyes, you seemed to have long arms/forearms, and therefore you could bow straight and use up most of the bow without having to straighten your arm (and bend your wrist) as much as other people need to do. Accordingly, I think my eyeballs missed seeing some of the usual wrist-bending and impression of fluidity at the bow ends, esp on the down bows.

My second sense of the video was that you played well enough technically that my ears missed hearing some more smooth phrasing or dynamics -- some up and down, loud and soft, some fast and slow, some variation. Instead, the playing sounded fairly straight and controlled (which is what most playing sounds like when anyone is first struggling to put the whole song together for the first time in a snapshot video of one place in their journey).

On Suggestions for Improvement

If you asked me for suggestions, I'd say try to work on some smooth phrasing and some dynamics, to get away from the straight playing. In order to pull that off, I think that you will have to get a little more fluid wrist-bending at the ends of your bowing, relax a bit more (which will only come from another 300? :-) focused repetitions of the song), and when you start injecting some Regina-feeling into the piece, to make your version of it your own.

On Treble's Comment - Take time now, or get stuck later

I read another comment the other day (maybe on the BulletProofMusician website?) that quoted an old music saying: "Practice not until you can do it right. Instead, practice until it's never wrong." (Wow, until it's never wrong -- now that's a high playing standard! :=) It seems to me that most of us post a video when we're close to getting it right after 50 takes (at least I found myself doing that).

So to combat my "50 takes" (a journey in itself, right?) thinking in my mind, I posted a "2015 Status video" in January of this year, where I did a little video recital and played the only five little pieces that I knew, playing them back to back, with no stopping, and limited retakes for the set, as if I was on stage.

I made up the "5 pieces, no stopping, no retakes" rules to force myself to face up to (and to accept) my current playing abilities. Rule: 5 songs, so I couldn't "cheat" by focusing on one at a time; 5 songs is a better statement of my average playing ability. Rule: Play them all back to back, so I couldn't focus on any one song. Rule: Limited retakes, so I wouldn't waste much time. I limited myself to 5 retakes for the whole set. If I wanted to do a retake, I had to retake the whole 5 songs, and risk making a different mistake in a different song. So you could see, I had to accept minor mistakes, and be happy with them.

Maybe you could set some rules and play a game like this for yourself. It made doing recital videos more fun and challenging for me, maybe it will work for someone else.

Good luck! (And we all look forward to your next video... :-)

Regina,

you did a great job and it's time to learn another piece...well done!

I just watched a recital for a Suzuki studio of a dozen or more kids.  They played this one.  You played it just as well if not better.  What are you seeing that is not ready.  I thought this was great- definitely ready to move on IMHO.